How To Get Your Girlfriend/Boyfriend Back After A Quarrel - Can Sorry Save Your Relationship?
Posted: Friday, January 01, 2010
by Kacycarr
http://www.spotthepimple.com
Get your girlfriend boyfriend back - Well it's been and gone has 2009. That's right the Christmas/New Year celebrations have ended and festive jolliness is over. And sadly for some that's all that's not over. When the tree comes down and stripped of its tinsel there's other things people have to get over. Relationships tend to break down around this time leaving lots of girls/ boys getting over being apart from their lover.
Aside from those all time familiar words come midnight Dec 31st "Have a Happy New Year" so is "It's over between us?"
Is the reason you have split from your partner, or breakdown of your relationship/marriage one you think can be sorted? If so this is good news. But what of those at an all time low because they believe their relationship dead, and there's nothing they can do to make things right. Who says you can't. You shouldn't give up that easy. If it's only a rift then look for ways to heal that rift. Was it a silly argument you both had at a party? Remember, people tend to say things they don't really mean when they're drunk. If there's chance of reconciliation then work at it. Make sure your boyfriend/girlfriend has had time to sober up before any confrontation. When patching things up, don't hold it against your partner for not apologizing as they may not remember a thing from the night before.
It's a regular thing couples breaking up after a quarrel; but it's just as common for them to get back together again also. Relationships that end this way are most likely after a few kind words and a meaningful sorry sees the row forgotten.
Usually the bust up that is the cause for someone finishing with their lover and going their separate ways is hardly given a second thought at the time of making up. But, if the quarrel started over another man/woman then making up may take longer, that's if it happens at all.
Ways to say sorry after a bust up with your boyfriend/girlfriend
There will always be the highs and lows. Ever heard that saying about how "True love never runs smooth." Depending on what sort of person and how strong you are will determine how you cope with situations like this. Some folk are weaker than others and it shows when their left a broken man/ woman after a lovers tiff. And then we have them that don't shed a tear and move on with a carefree attitude "plenty more fish in the sea."
It's no use sulking over the break up. Why let a squabble interfere, with your feelings. Get up off your butt dry your eyes and go say sorry if you're at fault. There's no easy way to say sorry and especially more so if you're a hot headed person. If you can admit it was you that caused the argument it will make the apology to your girlfriend/boyfriend hell of a lot easier.
- Admit you were wrong from the start and don't try to weasel out of it by making the innocent person feel guilty. Don't make a big issue about apologizing. Say it and be done. How you come across with this sorry can make or break the relationship.
- Bring them a peace offering gift as your way of saying sorry.
- Ask them out on a date to talk things through.
- Spend time together alone. Treat them to a day out doing something they like doing.
- Give her flowers/chocolates, and him a sloppy kiss or whatever you think he'll let his guard down for and accept your apology.
- Avoid another fight. Don't argue over who started the quarrel first.
- Be sincerely sorry for your mistakes. A person whose in pain after a split will know if you're apology is genuine. Is it worth taking the risk of saying a meaningless sorry? Be honest with yourself and more importantly them you hurt.
- Treat your partner with respect and value them as a person. Learn to respect his/her feelings and whatever else needs respecting.
Was the fight between the two of you more serious than your average lovers tiff? Do you believe in your heart the relationship is over for good, and all the sorry's' in the world won't get him or her back. If you keep on thinking like this then you're right, it won't. Stay positive. You both will have had good times together so why throw it all away, at least try and save your relationship.
There's always a cause behind a split. Get to the root cause for the parting and fix it, or avoid it, and there's every possibility any indifferences will sort themselves out.
Sit down and think if this relationship can be saved and is it worth saving. If your heart says yes it is, then what are you waiting for. It may be difficult if one partner wants it to work and the other doesn't...but hey lighten up difficulties are there to overcome. If your partner's against getting back together it doesn't mean they don't love you and don't want it to work; they may just think its useless carrying on with the way things are. Without answers for all the bickering that certain someone who's against reconciliation will struggle to believe it can ever work. Clear the air and also any misconstrued assumptions that are keeping you both are part.
General Advice on Relationships
Its scary how people stay together for the sake of the children or for appearances or worried over being alone. Putting on an act is not good. There's no guarantee things will better and neither your health by sticking around and living in hope.
If you've stuck together for the children's sake, it's possible over time and working out you're problems it can better improve the relationship...of course not always the case for everyone.
You "both" need to be sincere about wanting the relationship to work. The worst thing you can do is make empty promises. Making that all important commitment to each other to do what it takes will give you the foundation you both need to bond again.
Talk about the miseries and let downs you're not happy with. Whatever issue is the cause of the breakdown of your relationship it has to be brought out into the open so you can identify the problem and sort it. People fail to get back together and save their relationship because they hide their true feelings and fears. How can your partner try and make amends if they don't know what's wrong. The daring and hardest part is to say what you feel. A lot of couples make the mistake of identifying symptoms in their relationship instead of the true issues.
If there's been an act of infidelity and you're spouse, boyfriend/girlfriend has been unfaithful then it may take more than a few talks. There's no excuse for someone straying from one bed to another. Depending on your feelings about giving someone a second chance you might need the help of a councillor. Relationships can work after an adulterer has been forgiven. If adultery has happened its worth questioning if lack of intimacy is the problem in your relationship, still no excuse but worth looking into.
If you can reach an agreement on the fault/flaw in your relationship then discuss ways to put it right. It's not easy during peace talks when you're innocent; however I suggest you grit your teeth if you want the relationship back to the way it was. Be adult and no yelling. Having to point out things while you chat will be hurtful; maybe downright painful for your partner to hear, but not as painful if you don't come clean and walk through the door without an explanation.
Is sex the problem in your Relationship or other that you would like to sort out fast?
wow, i love this page...im seeing my special one tomorrow..he and i got into a lil argument and i am bringing a cream pie with candies saying sorry on top..lol...i learned so many things in here...this is a great page!!..thanks a lot Kacy! relationship is really complicated..lol..its a job with overtime...lol..Hi Joanne things only get complicated if you let them. The cake will certainly sweeten him up. Have a fab time
Kacy
